From Independence to Interdependence

At the heels of Independence Day in the US - as relating to a country’s independence - why not reflect on independence in our personal lives?

Independence means we are able to question authority and ourselves. We equate independence with freedom. Freedom means deciding on our own terms, being in charge of our own time and using it according to our own preferences. Who doesn’t want that?

We may be able to reach a state of independence through hard work, favorable conditions, or conscious choice. However, being dependent or independent may to some degree also be part of our personalities. Regardless of which portion of each or both of those we have, independence is also a life skill. All life skills can be learned, and old, engraved life patterns can be changed, if we choose to.

Sometimes our circumstances make us dependent: financially, emotionally, physically, or in other ways. No one wants that, but it is easy to get caught up in such scenarios. Co-dependence is when we allow our own identity to get blurred as we let others influence our decisions and belief systems.

We can be dependent through a circumstance, but that does not exclude our ability to be free. Freedom is also the ability to think and speak as one chooses. The danger lies in feeling we must agree on everything rather than respect both the shared interests as well as the differences in our views and choices.

Some people are of course dependent on others due to handicaps of various natures, but fortunately, the world has enough people who gladly give of themselves to be of help to others.

Autonomy is the opposite of dependency; we dare to be ourselves, we are aware of our own needs and wants. We hear our own inner voice. It is built from self-care and self-knowledge.

But just how independent are we?

We depend on others in our general lives for services, goods, and support, and for things to function. We are connected through groups of identifiers such as our roles, gender, status, occupation, interests, location, beliefs, handicaps, physical characteristics, etc., through which we relate to commonalities in each other and have a feeling of belonging.

We are interconnected. We are all part of a structure, the larger cosmic web of universal connection. One piece is moved or changed and it is felt throughout the web. We are intertwined.

Is the goal or purpose absolute independence and self-sufficiency? Just how far ought we take the idea of independence as the greatest goal?

What if we made it our goal to learn to depend on each other – based on trust and mutual respect, maintaining our individuality within the dependency?

Instead, we can show each other how much we need each other's help and acknowledge our interdependence.

Interdependence means we know we are connected and all attached to the same web, and therefore each other, but we also know that we need each other.

This way of thinking and living would make us all stronger, and thereby strengthen the web that holds us all together. Let’s not just imagine a world where all people and all countries live as one, but accept that we do. Our job, as a person or country, is to acknowledge that independence itself is not what it is made up to be, not where our freedom ultimately resides.

"When we try to pick anything out by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe."
- John Muir